Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Thought Provoking

Sarah Mae just posted today (technically yesterday) about being imperfect.  It was a simple, to the point and beautiful post.  I highly recommend it, and wanted to talk about it a bit.  
"He loves me through the failure, because He already knew about my dark, selfish soul when He died for it."
I commented and then thought, I need to share here.  I am imperfect by far.  I struggle in being tolerant, of having patience, of being a good friend and wife. (and the list goes on)  Every day.  It's something I tried so long to hide, because that was how I felt things were done.  I didn't want to be a martyr.  I didn't want to fail.  I wanted it to look like my life was so together.  

But it wasn't.  

It still isn't.  

I have days where I yell and then apologize.  I have days where I don't get anything done I needed done.  I have days lately that find me on my knees crying out for some relief.  

My faith took a huge hit with my marital problems.  But the time things changed?  Last week I literally hit my knees sobbing and praying.  And suddenly there was a turn around.  As if a miracle had occurred within a day or so my heart was perfectly calm and my husband was aiming to do better as a husband, as a friend.

We were saved.  And though there will be rough patches, my knees will be hitting the ground through them.  Because when I try to be perfect, when I try to fix things, I fail.  Every time.

But He never does. 

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