Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Love Part 1

My friends and I talk relationships a lot, as we all have had issues with our significant others at one point or another.  With new friends it can be that awkward moment.  Because what they've seen is this cute couple who is crazy about one another.  When a friend needed advice I was honest about the fact that we've had major issues before.  And when I was asked how bad it got I was bluntly honest to a point I seriously thought, "These girls are going to think I'm a super monster bitch and never want to hang out with me again."  Because where G has failed in following through on his words I have more than made up with choice words of my own.  (And throwing things, which I think I've finally learned is a bad idea when it results in laundry detergent sprayed all over the stairs and hallway.  Ahem.) 

The reality is, though, that we're in a good place.  We do fight occasionally and some days even with him halfway around the world I want to kill him.  But he's planning things for when he gets home (date nights!) and I'm continuing to apologize when I strike out with words.

Some people have been lucky and their love has been easy.  From what I have seen, that's a rarity.  Two people living together and going through life can be extremely messy.   But over time that becomes a beautiful mess as you learn where you need to change and where you need to learn acceptance.  It has been said that the road to hell is paved with good intentions.  I say the road to a long lasting marriage is paved with learning to forgive and try again.

My husband is an amazing man and probably the only person in the world who has seen my ugliest moments and still thinks I'm the most amazing woman he knows.  There is a deep love that is hard to explain to others, it is the foundation for why we keep trying.  It used to be that he was this lovesick guy who was crazy about me but I couldn't be bothered.  It still amuses me how crazy in love with him I still am, even when I'm super mad.  I think he holds the moon, basically.  And even when he messes up I keep going because I know in his heart he really wants to be better, but we all fall sometimes.

Love is a deeply complicated and all too simple thing.  And coming up on our 4th anniversary I can say for certain for the first time I have absolutely no doubts that I made the best decision of my life the day I chose this boy.  It's been a rough ride but one I'd do all over again. 


  1. Love is more than just a four letter word..I guess loving someone means loving them even though they won't love you back...Daniel

  2. That makes perfect sense to me. Love takes a lot of work, but if it's worth it, it's the best kind of work!

  3. Beautiful post, and I share a lot of the same sentiments about my boy and our relationship. Marriage/partnership is work, and sometimes people forget that and expect things to be happy and lovey dovey all the time. I think the difficult moments bring us closer together though, and that I wouldn't change anything about my husband because I know he doesn't want to change anything about me (even if I think I could use an attitude adjustment sometimes!)

  4. I havent posted before but do read your blog and I think you have put that so beautifully xx

  5. Love really is a verb and a decision.