Carry Me Home

I would like to state first that I love Charm City.  I think it has many....charms.  It's a foodie city, with lots of amazing restaurants and chefs willing to meet the demand for fresh local fare done creatively and done well.  That being said, this is not "home" to us.  I hope that someday it will be more so, but currently it's a waiting place, a place we've been placed that we're nesting in.

We have never hidden the fact that living in England was the single most life changing experience for us as newlyweds.  We found not only our feet as a couple, but also ourselves.  And while the country is certainly not perfect (we've discussed that we would not want to only be citizens of Britain), it is the place that we call home.

 Nothing like a summer drive in Britain.....Sophie was often along.

Over the last 6-8 months it has become acutely noticeable that that will not change. We can be driving and instead of pleasant conversation we're both trying to come up with how to get back, powwow-ing ideas of escape. On a sunny day I can close my eyes while driving and almost convince myself we're winding on the road to Bury St. Edmunds.  Driving into a Ellicott City, I can almost convince myself we're there going up those twisting hills.  I did not get up to watch the Royal Wedding this morning, but I did catch the tail end of it, and when they mentioned Cambridge, my mind instantly flew home to the roads I could probably drive in my sleep.

Picnic at the Abbey.

When G and I first discovered I was pregnant, one of the first things out of my mouth was, "I want to go home now."  G always dreamed of pushing our SilverCross pram around the Abbey (have I ever mentioned that we have a vintage 1964 black and white SilverCross pram?).  I want to take them to the Christmas Fayres.  I want to hold our child while their daddy runs the charity Santa run.  And we want to picnic on the Abbey grounds watching the ducks.  And when our favorite tea room in England wished us congratulations during the announcement yesterday I broke down because my child may not attend afternoon tea there for a long time. (While trying for children while living there before I had dreamed of bringing a plump baby for tea time.)

It is not an easy thing to admit.  That the place you were born and raised is not "home" in your mind.  People get offended, taking it as a slight to themselves.  But I believe that every person has a place that just feels more like them.  So we have spent much time in conversation, discussing options.  G and I will eventually end up back here in Charm City because that is where his career field is really centered.  However, we are quite desperately trying to figure out how to get home before a second child.  And I'm a wee bit heartbroken because I'm not certain it's possible.

Still, I am a generally positive person.  I believe we'll find a way home, someday.  Until that moment arrives, then I will just try and bring England here.  My friends have expressed great interest in this thing called clotted cream (which I make from scratch), so hopefully we'll be doing tea soon.  And we're looking into having the SilverCross pram completely restored to used as a bassinet in our bedroom for now (we have a brown corduroy one that will be perfect for pushing around the gardens here....yes we packed up 2 prams from England).  We simply will carry on until we find a way to carry me home.

Let It Flow

I have 2 novels that I am working on, and a third in my head.  I just knocked out the first several chapters of the second one, and I am just so grateful.  It's flowing out of me.  I always say I don't write the books, the thoughts come to me and I feel like I am recording the life of other people.  I love getting to know the characters in the stories, having them come alive for me.  And today was a good day.  This next year is going to be a whirlwind of finishing this and attempting to get it published.  It's terrifying, but I am ready to let my babies fly from the nest.  

A Day In The Sun

(This is the version of a nicoise salade I made on Friday night)

I know, I know, it's Monday, the picnic was Saturday and I am just now getting around to writing about it at all.  I'm kind of a bad blogger sometimes.  Eh.  But after the picnic it was one adventure after the other, and I just kind of put it all off.  

The picnic was fantastic.  I put on a cute skirt and off we went with our blanket and picnic basket full of yummy goodness.  I had cut up a few carrots into sticks and half an English cucumber.  I made some roasted chicken breast sandwiches on ciabatta bread with tomato.  And I even put a bowl of strawberries in the basket to munch on.  We had almost a full bottle of red left, so in it went as well.  It was a nice day out, the abbey was very crowded with people lying about, picnic-ing or tossing a frisbee or kicking a football.  We found a spot near where we were the last time we had so much fun at the abbey and spread out.  We ate, we drank, and we read a couple newspapers his parents had sent us from back home.  At one point G got made fun of (I heard it, he didn't......but we both giggled when I told him about it!) by a teenager who was saying, "I don't have a picnic blanket.  I don't have a picnic basket.  I'm frou-frou-y, but I am not that frou-frou-y.  Isn't it romantic?  Doesn't it make you want to vomit?"  Imagine that said in a very whiny British teenage voice.  It was quite funny and since it was only the group on teens around we decided that making out on the picnic blanket was a good punishment for them.  

My friend Nancy (who I went on the cruise with) lives there so we usually park our car at her place and walk to the abbey.  We had told her we were going to be in town, and that we might grab some coffee, so when we went back to the car to drop our things off we knocked to see if she was awake and wanted to grab coffee.  She had gone to market earlier, so we sat around and chatted about things going on.  All of us are leaving this summer, around the same time, so it's a busy time.  

Three hours later we were walking out the door to drive to Cafe Rouge for coffee.  I was a tad bit nervous, because it was now nearly 8, and on a Friday night that can be bad.  Sure enough Cafe Rouge literally had one table open, so we grabbed it (it helps that the people who work there love us, so they try to find room for us).  We grabbed some coffee and a banana and chocolate crepe.  Delicious!  And it was a good boost for the night because everyone we love there stopped to chat and I got a couple comments about how pretty my skirt was.  It's going to be hard when we leave, since I love finding a place where you get to know the people.  It makes it's sad to say goodbye.

After that we went home and decided that we wanted to head out for drinks and maybe try to find some live music or dancing.  We ended up at a pub about 15 minutes away, but when we sat down with our drinks we realized that everyone was more sexily dressed, and the DJ was playing more hip hop/dance music.  We downed the drinks and then headed back to base (told you it was an adventure) where I proceeded to change out of my skirt, shirt and flats into long jeans, a tank top with shrug and some high heels.  I also completely changed my make-up and curled the ends of my hair.  I'm quick, so half an hour later we were back at the pub drinking and dancing the night away.  I had a blast, but it's been a while since me and heels hit the dance floor (and got low, low, low on the dance floor) so my thighs have been sore ever since.  It was worth it though.

(This is us before heading back out, I had drank a pint very quickly, so I must admit I look a little dazed.)

On the way home we stopped of at a roadside stand and got chips and a cheeseburger with grilled onions which while horribly unhealthy was fantastic.  Then we crashed on the couch, calling our families and chit chatting before finally heading to bed to pass out.  

Yesterday we stayed in bed most of the day discussing some things coming up.  And now G just left to go back to work after stopping in for lunch and working out.  Today I need to clean some more, as I continue to get the house ready to move.  I know I said I would post about changes, but that will have to wait until next time, this post is already so long!

Goodness

Our car is fixed and we are heading in a bit to pick it up!  Woohoo!

Due to lack of car G and I have been walking everywhere.  Yesterday total we walked around 5 miles, which while it is only a couple miles more than we usually walk, I definitely felt it worked off anything I ate!  We stopped off at the park here on base to take pics of the ducks.  I love how protective the males are right now.....how cute the little duck couples are.  

(One of the planes we have on display here)

I have been making more of an effort to dress in clothes I love everyday.  Today I threw together this outfit quickly.  Comfy jeans, comfy tank top, and a cardigan over it because today is quite overcast.  A simple beaded headband to make me look like I did something with my hair.  And some red shoes to add a punch of color! (actually as G was taking the pic he commented that he really liked the red shoes with it.....which is nice because he's not the guy to notice those type of things!)

This weekend will be fun, I think.  If the weather is nice I think we will finally have our picnic in Bury.  And we might even bring the lovely Sophie along so she can romp and introduce herself to every child within a five mile radius.  

Lately I have been kinda deep in thought about crap that is going on in our lives, and the lives of those we know.  Lots of planning, lots of plotting.  And of course the occasional admittance that "thou shall not kill" is pissing me off lately, because I could name a bitch or two who really need to make better uses of their lives.  Apparently I need to go to confession.  But as G and I begin the next chapter of our lives it annoying to realize that as much as I would love to shut everyone else's crap out of my life, they're family, and it just isn't easy to have their problems not affect you.   

So I am trying to think positive.  I have a husband who is wonderful and thinks the best days are days spent with me.  I have a family who is extremely tight and we go to battle for one another when needed.  I have great friends who when I come home this summer better be ready to go out and dance the night away.  I have a neighbor who is great for the self-esteem......pretty much every time I see her she comments that I am getting so skinny and my outfits are cute!  And last, but of course not least, I have my health, I have my sanity (thus far) and I have a belief that life is overall pretty damn fantastic.