I was raised with my maman constantly repeating that "everything happens for a reason".  And so I believe it.  Not because I necessarily hold any real stock in it, but because the saying is as much a part of who I am as anything else I was raised with.  


So when I am having my moments of doubt, I try to repeat it as a mantra.  


Because I'm scared.  G and I are buying a gorgeous home....in a questionable neighborhood. Partly because we had a certain price point we weren't willing to really budge on, and partly because we love the city, we wanted to live in it, not just near it.  The house already has a security system on it, including video feed from the front step so we can see and hear who is there from our second floor landing.  And next door there are newlyweds who have been working on making their backyard look nice.  And always a good sign...the block behind us has houses that all have lots of flower pots.  


We did crime report research on the neighborhood.  It's in downtown Baltimore.  Crime happens, we were okay with that.  Muggings, car break ins.....these don't worry us.  I'm planning on taking a self defense class, and we are preparing to be okay.  We researched all the way back to January 2008, and our block is just a quiet little block.  Well, we have one questionable individual, but I am telling myself it won't be a problem.  The worst thing that seems to happen there is the occasional stolen car.  Or graffiti, we have some low grade writing to clean off part of the front of the house (it extends onto the newlyweds as well, and you can barely see it, because it's like sidewalk chalk.....but words I don't like to hear people use).  


I'm still scared.  But G won't be deploying for at least another year, and we're taking precautions.  We're planning on calling ADT to set up even more security measures, and installing motion sensor lights in the back for when we have to let the dogs out.  


And then today we found out that the seller is going to install a privacy fence after closing (there will be money held in escrow until he finishes).  And I breathe a little easier.  Because that's something I didn't want us to have to do.  I want to be able to get into the sowing more grass seed and planting peonies part.  


Everything happens for a reason.  I don't need to know all the reasons because I have faith that there is a purpose to this life.  

Words Are Powerful

Last night I was dancing around our hotel room.  Ballet dancing if you want specifics.  I was wound up, and when I have a bunch of energy I dance.  Normally no one else is around (this built up energy generally occurred when G was at work overnight, because when he's around we keep busy and I don't get that built up) but last night, G was in bed watching me.  When I finally calmed down enough to crawl into bed G was just staring.


Me: What?


G:  You make me wish I could paint.


Me:  Thank you.  Have you said that before?


G:  Well, I was thinking it yesterday.


Me:  No, I think you've said it before. Or else someone else has.


G:  I don't know, I think it a lot.


Words are indeed powerful.  Every day I struggle with my body issues.  Every. Single. Day.  My eating disorder is not a choice, it's a constant.  But I aim to ignore it, and I am the luckiest girl in the world.  Because for the first time in my life I am with a man who I don't worry is looking at any other woman wishing I looked like her.  G's eyes are always on me, they follow me as I walk across a room.  It is not uncommon for me to turn around and find my husband just looking at me, this happens several times a day.  


I got lucky.  My greatest wish for any woman is that she finds herself beautiful and worthy. And that she finds someone (a friend, partner, anyone) who daily confirms that she is indeed spectacular, something special.  Because I don't know a single woman who isn't.  I've been blessed to find so many through this blog.  Powerful women.  Amazing women.  I just hope they know that.

I having one of those days where I just feel lazy.  I've watched some Gossip Girl, I've re-painted my nails (what can I say, I'm hard on nails).  I've eaten a Lean Cuisine ravioli meal (I like them, but I add cayenne, garlic powder, onion powder and crushed red pepper).  And I'm sipping on Perrier listening to some court case show in the background. 


The only thing I've accomplished thus far today is doing my eye make-up, since G stopped dead in his tracks last night because I'd done a simple smoky eye.  Apparently he thinks it's sexy.  So trying to be a wife he wants to come home to, I've stepped it up a notch.  

(I always get a weird deer-in-the-headlights look when I have to take a close up)

I need to pick up around the room, organize the suitcases.  But that would require leaving bed, and I'm just not sure I want to do that right this second.  


All I know is G will be home in a couple hours and rather than getting out of the hotel room, I think we'll stay in.   Pick up a couple good books and relax.  It's one of those days, and I'm completely okay with it.

Correction

My nail color....not Russian Navy.  Which is good since G kept jokingly telling me that that would make my grandfather turn over in the ocean.  (since my argument for the reason I think he should have joined the navy always reverts back to my grandpa, who was a navy submariner)

I was painting my toes the same color tonight having decided I LOVE this color.  G says it's sexy.  Go figure, I was worried it would appear too emo.  I look at the bottom and see it says Light My Sapphire.  Then I remembered that Russian Navy was too royal blue-ish. 


So, if anyone is interested, there ya go. If anyone knows of a good charcoal grey or concrete color let me know! 

One Year

I was searching through old comments trying to find a blogger who had commented once whose blog I had enjoyed but lost track of.  And scrolling down to the first post ever it hit me.

Holy Crap.  It's been a year today since I posted my first blog post, Becoming Who You Are.

Really?  A year?  

Am I the same? 

Well, I still like the nice things in life.  Champagne still tickles my fancy, and I own even more silk, linen, cashmere and lace then I did then.  

I'm currently having to hunt down a new affordable bordeaux to drink regularly, since I haven't seen my old love since England.

We plan on having a coffee table with actual coffee table books in the new house.  I am more excited about that than you could possibly know!

However I still don't own an Hermes scarf.  Damn. (not from lack of trying, but I am particular about what pattern I want, so we always leave the stores empty handed)

(I am really wanting the one Les Cles with keys all over it, and a scarf that had tassels on it.....the key one is easy to find, but hard to find in the colors I want, a deep navy blue or black all over with silver or gold keys.)

(this scarf can be found on ebay here)

But I am so different than who I was a year ago.  I've allowed myself to change, to accept who I am.  I'm more in love with G than ever.  Because what I never shared was that a year ago I was on the phone with my family trying to figure out how to get the hell out of England and my marriage.  That's hard for me to write, but it's what it was.  

I'm looking at moving into the inner city.  I'm exhilarated and terrified.  I'm pretty sure it won't be permanent, but who knows?  We may love it.  

Still no babies, and that's ok.  We go back and forth trying to decide the right time.  We thought it was sooner, now we think it might be later.  There's a lot of life here in this city and we're too preoccupied letting the rhythm pulse through our veins.

I'm braver than I was a year ago.  I wanted to be me, but was still scared.  Now I am who I am.  My family and friends have learned the hard lesson that they either have to accept it or move on.  I don't have time for people who want me to fit into a mold of who they think I should be.  

And I've gotten to know some amazing bloggers out there.  I've e-mailed for recipes, advice, or to compliment them on the fantastic women that they are.  I've struck up a friendship with someone on the other side of the world (hi J!) who rocks.  I've kept my sanity (which G loves this blog for).  

One year.  A blink.  My how time flies.

Weighing In

Or not.


I have hit an odd moment in my life.  I don't have a freakin' clue what I weigh.  For most people this might not be unusual.  But for a recovering bulimic who up until she left England weighed herself several times a day (pretty much any time I wandered past the scale.  what can I say?  I'm obsessive.) this is MAJOR.  I did weigh myself a few times when we were home, but since the scale was at my parents home, and we weren't there too much, it was random.


Now, our scale is in holding (the movers hold your things for up to 3 months while you find a home), and although we've talked about getting a digital one I feel like that might be a bad idea.  


I don't need to know.  And while part of me wants to know, another part of me is scared I will be disappointed.  So why bother?  


I know this:  I'm pretty much a size 12, something I wasn't sure I would ever reach.  I think even my feet have shrunk a bit (a feat that's impressive since I have always had thin feet and hands) because a lot of size 11 shoes are just too big.  I tried on a bunch of Manolos the other day and every single size 11 fell off.  Like literally fell off, because they were too loose, even across the top.  So I now know I wear a 10.5 in Manolos (now to just figure out the Jimmy Choos and Louboutins).  


And those are the numbers I want to focus on.  The feel of clothing on me.  How comfortable I feel in my own skin.  


Lately.....I feel fucking fantastic.  That's good enough for me!

10 Things Few People Know About Me

1.  I have a birthmark/mole thing on my stomach that I've had all my life.  My mother and grandmother also have them in the same general spot on theirs.  I am wondering if perhaps it's one of those genetic birthmarks?  


2.  I have a thing for silk scarves, probably inherited from my Grandmama, but rarely wear them.  Probably because I'm 25 and there are only so many ways you can wear them in this country without looking like either an idiot or a Euro-snob.  I might be one or both, but I don't want to shout it from the rooftops.


3.  Bad grammar drives me batty.  But only when spoken.  If typed/written I (usually) don't notice or care.  But I have a friend, God love her, who makes me cringe on the inside when she speaks.


4.  I really don't like pale woods.  Oak makes me want to vomit.  It needs to either be dark or painted.  


5.  Sometimes I like to play pretend when G and I are out.  As in, perhaps, just maybe, act like a bigger bitch than I am.  Yesterday I was cracking G up by imitating Rachel Zoe (the fashion stylist) as we were shopping.  I even imitated her voice.  And I might have snapped my fingers at G.  And declared that I was bored, the clothes were boring, the people were boring, and to kindly shut it.  


6.  I'm not a literary snob.  I really wish I was.  But I will read pretty much anything you put in front of me.  I'm a sponge like that.  Hence the reason I have vast knowledge on things I couldn't give a damn about.  


7.  I've considered getting a job just for shopping money.  And G would support that.  I took one step onto American soil and I've adapted far better than I would have liked.  It pisses me off.  


8.  That being said, even when I have money I am tight fisted, don't like to part with it, and ALWAYS have buyer's remorse.  So getting the job would be useless except for saving a lot of money.  Which I would use to splurge on something big.  And immediately hate myself for it.


9.  I hold loyalty above most other traits.  I will take a bat to someone's head for you, and I expect the same.  So when a friend lets me down it really hits me hard and takes me forever to recoup.  And I hold grudges.  (but like to pretend I let go of things)


10.  My biggest regret about England was in the end I had an opportunity to sit for an artist, but with the move didn't take the time.  It was going to be cheap, provide artwork for our home (the artist only asked enough to provide the paper/charcoal/etc).  And I can say we got busy, but I also got terrified.  They were going to be nudes/partial nudes (like with sheets draped or a dress falling off my shoulders) and I chickened out.  

End Goal

G and I tend to talk a lot about the future.  Not just, oh, 5 years from now we want an Audi (although we do).  But talk about what we want 16 years from now when he's retiring from the military.  Also, what we want to have accomplished by then.  Some of them are lofty goals, but I say reach for the moon, if you fail you'll land among the stars.  


So one of our big dreams/goals is to end up in France for a few years (or more).  The specifics change often.  Some days we want an apartment in Paris where we can get out and roam the city.  Other days we want to buy a farm in the South of France and have goats and a large garden.  This isn't unusual, since we have the debate even about where to live here. Never the suburbs, it's always about city or a place with some land.  


To achieve this we have plans, things we want to make sure and tick off our list.  Debts paid off, mortgage mainly paid off, school finished (at least for him, and usually this includes me too, but I want to do it without going into more debt).  We have amounts of money we want to put away.  Preparations.  


One of the big things is that I need to re-fluent myself, and G needs to learn French.  So we're going to Rosetta Stone it.  G makes me giggle with his (very) poor French, but boy does he try!  And we've talked about making a trip to Montreal this next Spring (where a Jaeger store is).  That way he gets some real life practice in before the big Paris trip.  We never took the time to go to Paris when we lived in England.  I want to see it in the fall, to carry an umbrella and wear knee high boots and a trench coat and tramp around the city I love so much.  To sit in a cafe sipping my cafe au lait, making observations about the life around us.  Blending in.  We're hoping this time next year we will be getting ready for a vacation.  


I rarely speak about the things I love the most.  I am secretive, keeping my cards close, while still appearing to be open.  I have pages of my history book that even G doesn't know, or doesn't hear me talk upon.  Paris is one of them.  When I went when I was 18 I cried as we left Paris to head to London.  I have never felt more at home than I did in Paris.  After 13 years of speaking the language I was worried it would be a nice trip, but would feel awkward.  That as an American I would feel out of place.  Instead, I was able to blend in.  To sit and drink wine at a local bar with my friends and not feel like we were on a trip.  Instead we all contemplated asking our parents to forward our things there.  The bohemian in me aches for that city.  For an old apartment with high ceilings and wooden floors.  A place to paint the city, and to make my fingers fly across the violin strings.  A place to belong.


So we plan.  We work on the language skills, not just for trips, but for life.  We watch French films without subtitles, learning to recognize the words from sound rather than putting one language to another.  We look up French versions of childhood books, keeping track of where to find them.  We research ways to make sure the (future) children will be fluent.  To make the transition easier if we decide to leave military life early.  


And the best part of this whole thing is not the planning, but the living, the doing.  Knowing we have end goals doesn't make the journey less exciting.  And finally G will know what I am saying when I play like a French woman....

Glorious

Today is one of those days.  Beautiful.  Serene.  Puffy white clouds, sunshine.  G and I had lunch at Panera (can I just say their black bean soup is delicious, but do like I did and ask for some red onion to put in it----I took red onion rings and chopped them up and mixed in).  Then before heading out into the warm light we picked up a pain au chocolat to enjoy.  We drove back to the hotel, sat on a bench and shared the treat.  Simple things, but good things indeed.

I think we're both still tired from yesterday.  The day before we had gone to Old Navy and picked me up 2 dresses, a skirt, a tank top, t-shirt, a one-shoulder shirt and a cardigan for about $35.  Not bad.  I am still trying to pair down my closet but needed some clothes that fit a bit better.  And a dress for less than $5 that I had tried on and liked before?  A nice little pick me up.

Yesterday we went out just to get out.  We didn't necessarily need anything, but wanted to look around.  First we went and had a late breakfast at Clementine.  They had a homemade sausage that had corn and mushrooms in it that was like nothing I have ever had before....I kept stealing bites since it was G's.

We hit up Off Broadway, a shoes store I had never heard of, and I picked up some cute (and oh so comfortable!) grey suede ankle boots.  

We stopped in at a beauty store for me to finally pick up some new nail polish.  A bottle of Russian Navy later and we were out the door.  Painted my nails today and I LOVE this color.  I've always been afraid of darks, but it looks great against my pale skin.  I'm currently looking for a charcoal grey color next.

We stopped in the Gap outlet.  I picked up a nice, semi-nautical blue and white dress that I plan to rock this fall (just adding in some warmer tones).  I first picked it up in a large, but realized quickly that while the large was fine for now it would be too loose by Christmas.  However, my thing is to not buy for the future, it needs to fit, but went ahead and tried on a medium.  Well lo and behold it fit!  It will definitely look better as I slim down (since I like these style of dresses to be more loose and swishy), but it works for now too.  

(it's hard to see on the hanger, but it is a very drapey dress, with loose sleeves, and a nice, defined waist.)

The Limited was having a 40% off everything in the store, including clearance.  Nice, but since the only thing I had was a medium size dress that I doubted I could get into, I wasn't that excited.  But when it fit I was almost jumping for joy.  I've been looking for a simple, but not boring, long casual dress, and this will work beautifully.  Especially next summer when I am hoping we will have a backyard set up ready for a Spanish BBQ (sangria, tapas, oh yes!).  

And finally we dropped into the Saks 5th Ave outlet and it was there that G finally found some sunglasses.  He has such a long and narrow face that it's been a difficult search.  But of course D&G came through for us.  His first fashion love, I say.  Now my only conundrum is how to justify getting the Ray Bans I want, since my justification used to be that they were unisex and we could see how we both looked in them.  

The day is still young, and the sun still glorious in it's light.  G wants to go for a "stroll".  His word, not mine.  And I am in my new skirt that calls for twirling.

Fatigued

I really want to post all about my day.  I do.  But I spent it trying on endless pairs of high heels while wearing a more form fitting than usual dress, and I hurt.  Oh how I hurt.  I did end up getting some cute grey suede ankle boots.  And a couple dresses.  And we finally found G some sunglasses. Pictures to come soon.  For now, I am going to lie in bed and think about how different it is to be back in America.  Convenient?  Yes.  But it does tend to put my shopping habit in overdrive.  Bad.

Because He Scares Me

Another Friday, another post of why I love G, why he rocks.  And the title may seem a bit odd.  But, I love him because he scares me.  This has two parts.


First, he scares me by how much and how unconditionally he loves me.  It doesn't matter how much I screw up, or how horrible I can be when I'm mad, his first reaction is still to just grab me and hold me.  Sometimes that means I am physically trying to throw him off of me, but he just wraps up tighter, soothing me until I am either calm or crying, overwhelmed with everything.  He has always loved me this deeply, and it has always been frightening.  I've mentioned before there have been times he's loved me far more than I loved myself.  And because it has always been unconditional, it terrifies me.  I think sometimes I'd rather him say "I will always love you unless..." but that's not his way.  There is nothing I have done or could do that would be beyond his forgiveness.  


And he terrifies me because I watch way too much t.v., and I realized while watching Grey's today that quite frankly I don't think I could ever handle him dying.  We're plainly going to have to go out a la The Notebook, wrapped up together.  Because if something ever happened to him, I don't know what I would do.  


I didn't use to feel this way.  Even a year ago I thought, it would suck, but I would pick up the pieces and be okay.  But every day these past few months I may have days where I want to hate him, but I only fall in love with him more.  Whether he's being goofy like yesterday and singing along to every. single. damn. jingle. that came up on a commercial (along with dance moves, oh yes.) or he's being sweet and making sure the coffee pot is ready for the morning.  So quite honestly, I am slowly learning that I cannot live without his goofy morning grins, his quiet strength.  


Love does indeed come softly.  I can say that while I was in love with G when I married him, and loved him deeply, I wasn't this much in love with him.  I didn't even know how to love this deeply.  I didn't know it existed.  This type of love comes from taking a beating, picking itself up, and learning to love despite the disappointments. This strength of love requires seeing each other raw, for all the insecurities, scars, and faults and realizing there is still no one else you could imagine as your partner.  It's a scary precipice to be on, knowing life without that person would be vastly changed.  


So G rocks because he's changed, I've changed, and he's changed me. For better or worse. 

B is for Baker

I love baking.  There is quite simply nothing better than the smell of warm bread in the oven----or the frustration wrought out by kneading and pounding dough!  So when I think of kitchen items I would really like, baking items are the first thing to really come to mind.  We already have a round pizza stone, which has proved incredibly valuable to have.  It's round, basic, and gets the job done (while looking horrible because I was young and didn't research the proper care of them).  However, it's size and shape have made using it as a bread stone difficult.  And because we never had a peel, warming it up in the oven was nearly impossible, so our pizza crust never turned out as crispy as we like.  


Well, those days are over!  One of the first things on our list to buy are a rectangular pizza/bread stone and a peel.  Williams-Sonoma has some, as does about every kitchen supply place around.  And from talking with friends and reading blogs I think we're going to save money and go with the cheaper ones at Bed, Bath, and Beyond:


Pizza Stone

Pizza Peel

My biggest problem with stones is that they get dirty, cannot be washed with soap, and that makes me gross out a little bit.  I tend to use baking soda for everything  and I found that it worked well in scrubbing things off of my pizza stone, and also making me feel like it was more clean.  Then the other day I stumbled across this on SurLaTable!

A pizza stone scraper!  Sign me up!  For 10 dollars, it would be worth every penny in my household.  Not a necessity, so it won't be one of the first things we buy, but it would be nice to have eventually.

The pizza stone and peel will be used for both pizza and bread.  But I am also considering getting a couple of these for when I make French bread.  I'm particular about getting the bread crisp and chewy on the outside and soft on the inside.  I've been eyeing these for over 3 years now, so I think perhaps it's time I gave them a whirl.

I also love to bake pies, tarts and quiche.  In fact, back in England I was known for it (and that's how you make friends with the neighbors and co-workers!).  I made do with what I had, glass pie plates, a white ceramic tart/quiche dish, and a rolling pin.  And while I'm excited to say I am getting my grandmother's worn smooth wooden rolling pin soon, there are a few items I would like as I continue my exploration is pie making:

Pie Weights

Pie Crust Shield (because my days of having to form aluminum foil around a hot pie are over!)

Tart Pans with Removable Bottoms

And finally, my long coveted Emile Henry Ruffled Pie Dish.  It comes in this beautiful red, a caramel color, and now even white.  I would like all 3, but for now I'll settle for a red that will get me from fall to summer!

Of course there are many, many other baking items I would love to have.  But for now, I would be satisfied to just have these.  Otherwise this post would take all day!

Do you have any baking items you cannot live without?  Some you've found useless?  Anything you are coveting for your kitchen?

Kitchen Products....and opinions wanted

Over on my original blog I began posting about kitchen items we're wanting for the new home.  I am always looking for advice from those who have these items, so please comment if you have an opinion!

Continuing the discussion, I must admit....if G and I had endless amounts of money we would have a professional kitchen with pretty much anything you could imagine, neatly stored of course.  Unfortunately we have a very modest budget (we just budget well for things we know we're going to want) and are no where near being close to having a professional style kitchen.  Someday.  

But we do want to have enough items to make our kitchen easy to work in.  Part of how we save money to be able to live the life we love is by having me (with sous chef G's help of course!) cook most of our meals at home.  For every nice dinner out we have to plan to compensate for that with good (and low cost) homecooked meals.  We also believe in slowly saving to afford top of the line equipment that will last a long time.  I would rather spend $100 on a cutting board that will last 5+ years, with me using it every week than buy a $30 board that will eventually splinter within 2 years.  

So, before we move on with the list of things we are saving for I also have a conundrum.  We're buying our first home, and the kitchen is part of what drew me in.  The nice new appliances will be handy dandy (although not so sure about the mounted microwave).  However, I have never used a gas stove.  Ever.  My parents had one when I was little, but I wasn't allowed to cook.  G's parents have only ever had a gas stove, but I didn't take my chance to cook on it this summer.  So I am a tiny bit intimidated.  My realtor assured me I will probably burn a few things then fall in love with it.  Still, any tips on how to work one of these things?  Do they still make things sticky like the old gas stoves did?

And secondly, granite counters.  Oh so pretty, right?  But I am worried about damaging them.  Researching them is on my list of things to do before closing.  I did hear that Method's granite cleaner is good.  

Anyone used this?  Like it?  Love it?  Think there's something better out there?  Have any other Method products you love?  We've never had easy access to these before, and we're trying to buy less chemical products and more natural ingredients cleaners.

I'll be posting more kitchen things today and tomorrow.  Come back and visit as I figure out what is going to be frugal in the long term, and what simply is just too much money or unnecessary.  

From Fashion To Food

Oh my, yesterday I did a lot of posting about fashion and beauty.  The post about hair cuts will be up soon, well, as soon as InStyle's page decides to work.  Today however has me thinking about kitchen equipment.


I do tend to own a lot of kitchen stuff, and occasionally an item no one else seems to have. But there are a few things I have been waiting to get until we moved back.  So I have been perusing online to see if I could find some things I just had to have.  


Now, I should note that I am a big fan of not having too much crap you never use in a kitchen.  Hence the reason that I still do not have a KitchenAid mixer or a large food processor.  The former because I really don't know what the hell I would do with it, and the latter because I wasn't sure I needed one.  I mix my own things by hand (I don't even like using the electric hand mixer) and up until recently I would have said that my blender and my little food chopper worked just fine in the place of a food processor.  


Then my blender literally blew apart a few months before leaving England while I was blending a soup.  And I began making more and more things such as pesto and sauces on my own.  And after trying my hand at making G some homemade mayonnaise and realizing that yes, you can do it by hand, but since I hate mayonnaise if it isn't quick and easy I don't want to do it.  


Basically I need a food processor.  I like to make things from scratch, and I simply cannot rely on doing it little by little with my mini food chopper.  So I've been looking at Cuisinart Food Processors, but my head is reeling.  So readers who have food processors, what size is normal?  They seem to have everything from 7 cups to 16!  I don't know that I need a 16 cup food processor, but maybe something in between?


Now, I have a deep dark secret that I should share.  I rarely use cutting boards.  I know, shameful, I have probably damaged my knives.  But we lived in a crappy place with crappy counters that were already marred, so I went ahead and just chopped and sliced on the counters.  Now, we will have granite counters that I am excited about, however, I have no idea what to do with them, other than knowing not to chop on them.  So I am looking into cutting boards.  I will need a non-wood one for meats (funny story, someone bought it off my registry for our wedding, but I never received it, so I didn't buy one thinking maybe it was getting mailed and once in England our base store never had them!).  I'm liking the anti-bacterial one from Williams-Sonoma:

For 20 bucks, it's decent sized (12x16) so it will work when I am cutting up a chicken or rack of lamb.  And it makes sure I have a designated meat board.  Before I was using a tiny plastic piece or getting very creative.  

I have a wood cutting board that is decent (just one from target, I think perhaps I need to oil it?), and I use it when making salsa simply because it was easy to keep things organized.  But I am wanting something a little heftier.  An end grain block maybe?  I like the thickness of these for one simple reason:  they make it easier on my back.  I'm tall (5'8" 1/2 exact) and leaning over a counter really kills my lower back.  I got lucky with our counters in England, because they were higher (go figure, the Brits aren't exactly known for their height), but here in the US that can be unusual, and I haven't really paid attention any of the times we've been at the house.  

So, back to the discussion, I don't know the difference between end grain, edge grain, acacia or bamboo.  But I do think they're pretty!  And expensive.  Damn expensive.  Not that I mind, I have heard that they're worth it and will last if you take care of them.  But I do want to make a good choice at that price (anything from $60-$200).  Here are the ones I am liking:

End Grain Counter Blocks:

Cannot decide between the square and rectangle (and of course my smart butt husband says it's because I need them both.....he is the reason we have too many things, and he doesn't cook!). 

Boos Edge Grain Cutting Board:

Can anyone explain the difference between a cutting board and a chopping board?

Now, I promised G he could have this next beauty because he loves cheese so much and wants to throw a cheese and wine party.

Slate Cheese Board:

I figure that paired with a small variety of cheeses and a bottle of red wine will be a nice love gift to give him this fall.

We are planning a trip to a Container Store soon for various household items.  To store the cutting boards neatly, and make them easily accessible under out cabinets we are picking up a couple of these tray dividers (that will also help with cookie sheets, muffin pans and pizza stones):

That really is only the tip of the ice berg of things we are planning to buy for the kitchen.  However, in the interest of not giving you too much to read at once I'll break it up.  And I think the rest will be posted later today over at my home blog Une Maison Chic.  So come over and visit!

Any kitchen items you cannot live without?  Let me know!  I cook, but am a novice when it comes to handy dandy kitchen items!

Giddy

I just ordered this Max and Cleo dress:

I have to say, I cannot wait for it to arrive!  I think it, plus some purple or navy tights and some strands of pearls will be the perfect little outfit for a night out of jazz and dirty martinis.  Now if only I could figure out how to get my hair to behave into a bumped up twist....

Any advice?

I think we all have different facets to our personality.  For me, it's the fact that I can come off very stoic at times (let's face it, Miss Manners is my hero, and I love etiquette), however I also have a darker side.  And really who doesn't?  Mine just manifests in the fact that I have a thing for bad boys.  For unfixable men.  It really explains my past relationships I tell you.  Ever since I was little I found the idea of the mafia, gangs, etc very alluring. Quite frankly it's odd that I didn't end up in a really bad relationship.  So is it really any surprise that I'm addicted to the show Sons of Anarchy?  No, no it isn't.  But I can tell you that G finds it amusing.


But as attractive as I find the whole tattoos and leather thing, I am a classier gal.  Which means that I like the nice version of biker wear.  When I was in England I fell in love with Jaeger.  No, not the damn liquor.  The clothing line.  And right before we left I fell in love with a leather jacket that is part biker gang, part Jackie Kennedy.  Now how the hell does one jacket accomplish that?  By looking like this (click on link to see bigger):

The jacket is on my wish list of things to get this fall.  It's a bit pricey, but should last a couple decades, so definitely worth it.  I actually had to convince G that we could not buy it when I tried it on in England, simply because we needed to keep a hold of our money for things like a car and house. 


I would love to pair this jacket with this necklace, the Elsa Peretti's Aegean necklace.  But until I can find a good look-a-like I definitely think the necklace will have to wait!


And pairing a silk ruffly top with a skirt like this leather one?  Joan Holloway meets biker gang indeed.  

Of course I should mention that clean cut G has always had a thing for bikes, leather and tattoos.  He doesn't have any tats yet, but he is all over me getting this look!  Although how one earth I would wear a leather pencil skirt on the back of a bike is beyond me....

Get Lost In A Book

The Lost Symbol by Dan Brown was an interesting quick read.  At 509 pages it was a bit longer than a paperback, but for those who know me, I killed it within a handful of hours, and that was getting up and moving around when I got restless.  


For those of you familiar with The Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons this book welcomes back his character Robert Langdon (played by the wonderful Tom Hanks in the films).  I was pleased, since although I have liked his other books, this character by far is my favorite.  


This book was a fun read for me since we just moved to the D.C. area.  It takes place in D.C. and so getting to hear about historical monuments and little known facts about the area made me a little more determined to get to see these places soon.  I'm a big history nut, and who doesn't love the random fun conspiracy theory (that Dan Brown's books always seem to involve)?  


This book involves a lot to do with the Freemasons.  I don't know a lot about them other than my mother's father was one, and my father-in-law is one now.  My mother-in-law cracks me up, because she too likes to bug my FIL and another lodge member with asking them about things like National Treasure. (If you haven't seen the movie with Nicholas Cage, do, immediately.  It will get your kids interested in the history of the founding of our country).  But in this book there are once again a lot of conspiracy theories about the freemasons, the ultimate super secret keepers.  So, if their ceremonies interest you, it describes some of them in the book, and Dan Brown claims they're accurate.


Another major plot point has to do with Noetic Sciences.  I personally had to google and wiki it, only to realize I had heard of it before.  You can read all about the Institute of Noetic Science, as well as googling to find out more in depth.  Basically it involves the study of the human mind, and our ability to do things with thoughts.  I am afraid if I try to explain too in depth I will just confuse you.  According to the wikipedia article I linked to, the Institute deals with "research into topics such as spontaneous remission, meditation, consciousness, alternative healing practices, spirituality, human potential, psychic abilities, and survival of consciousness after bodily death, among others."  It's obviously considered a little more out there, but I think we can all say there are things that happen that cannot be explained, so if someone wants to try to study things and figure it out, more power to them.


As for the book, I have to say I liked it, but I didn't love it.  It may be one of those I just need to read again, but I think the problem was really I didn't feel as if it was as in depth a novel as say The Da Vinci Code.  There wasn't as much information about the history of our country, the masons, or noetic science as I would have liked.  I felt like even Langdon seemed to have less to "say".  I will credit Brown in that while I figured out one of the major plot twists early, it was not as early as I usually do.  


Essentially, if you do not like a book that brings into question any Christian beliefs, then Brown's books are never going to be a good fit for you.  A big thing in this book is discussing the idea of God in each individual.  As a Catholic, this doesn't bother me whatsoever.  We have it emphasized every week as we cross ourselves in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.  We are taught that the Holy Spirit is the part of God in all of us.   Luke 17:21 says that "the kingdom of God is within you."  The book takes that a bit further, but it doesn't bother me.  I love the chance to be made to think about my faith and what scripture actually meant versus the literal translation.  But that's me. 


However, even if the books are not a good fit for you, I always urge people to read books that they might disagree with.  I think it is unhealthy to only read things that are consistent with your very beliefs.  For myself I have read books and articles that have me shaking my head, but I am glad to have read them if for no other reason that they reaffirm that I do not agree with that particular standpoint.


So, to conclude my rambling little review, I would say it's a pretty good book.  If you are not sure it's for you, borrow it from a friend or a library.  I personally found it a good place to start for me researching more about D.C. and also things in my faith.  And if you end up buying it but not liking it, please remember you can always donate it to your local library.  Books like these are always hard to get ahold of, so extra copies are always welcome.

Some Mornings

Some mornings seem too sweet to want to end.  I decided that having been up since 3:30 with a headache, and having already killed that much time, that at 6:20 this morning it was time to wake G up.  It was only 10 minutes before the alarm was supposed to go off, but he prefers to wake up to me anyways.  I slid under the covers ( I had been on the other bed in our hotel room reading and watching t.v. on the computer), curled up, he turned to face me and gave me a smooch, smiling with his eyes closed and his little boy morning face scrunched up.  When he sounded grumpy a bit later I attacked him, tickling him and repeating "Are you grumpy?  We don't have grumpy mornings!" as he thrashed about trying to escape.  Then I got pinned and he said he wasn't going to be able to move and go to work because if he let me go I would attack again.  I just grinned and said that was just fine, he didn't have to go.


Then 6:30 hit, and it was time to get up, go get some breakfast and get him ready to leave.  But this morning I didn't want him to leave.  I was feeling like a petulant child, and I told him no, he couldn't go to work, not today.  I have always said we have a good marriage because even when we're mad at each other (not today) we still would prefer to just be together.  Some days it's G at work just staring down the clock until he can get back to me, some days it's when I don't want him to leave.  Today was one of those days.  So I asked him to just spend the last 10 minutes curled up with me, to which he instantly complied.  I was curled up on his chest, just trying to absorb each other through osmosis in those last 10 minutes.  I told him I hadn't gotten enough smooches.  He pulled away and said, well, we can't have that!  I'll just have to give you so many smooches that the smooch jar fills up, and whenever you need one today, you just pull one out and you'll be fine.  He then proceeded to attack me with smooches.  I of course was giggling, and I thought 2 things.  First, I am lucky, because I have a husband who understands the importance of smooches.  And secondly, wow is he going to be an amazing father someday.  I can just picture a little boy or girl upset that Daddy is leaving to go somewhere, and him amazingly having the right response.  Makes a girl's heart burst with joy I tell you!


I finished The Lost Symbol, and once the headache goes away I will give it a review.  I'm afraid if I tried to now I would simply give things away without meaning to.  It was an interesting book, got me thinking a lot, so I hope you'll come back for my take on it later!  


*EDIT* In the attempt to be authentic and real, while my morning was nice and sweet it is a complete contrast to last night when I was exhausted, grumpy, bossy, and kept telling G to keep away because he was too hot and breathing on me!  I then promptly fell asleep in the wrong bed, and woke up cold this morning!

Me:  Kill the spider!

G:  Okay, missioned accomplished, spider detroyed!

He comes and kisses me on my forehead.

Apparently I was not impressed enough....

G:  That's okay, you can worship me later.

Ha!

Oh Happy Day!

Today was one of those days where the sun is shining, the people were smiling, and you just felt good to be alive.  Well, other than the fact that I was up nearly 24 hours, but eh, the price you pay for days like these.

We headed out to the farmer's market.  We were running a little behind since we both had to shower and clean up, and G asked me to sing while I was in the shower.  So we went through Somewhere Over The Rainbow, Amazing Grace (that's his favorite, he requests it every time), and then I drew a blank and began to sing songs from Little Mermaid.  Oh yes, we went Disney.  I ended up getting out, and looking up some Disney songs on youtube.  Garret has never seen Pocahontas.  I know, right?  His parents, God love them, were a little out of it when it came to kids movies, I'm just sayin'.   

So as I was saying we were running late, but thank God, unlike last week today was not a huge Ravens game, so traffic was fine.  We walked around, bought some yummy goods, including a french baguette, some pluot plums, and some fresh from the garden arugula.  We've been searching high and low for it since getting back to the states, and outside of restaurants coming up blank.  Well not today, I've literally eating a good 1/4 lb of it.  

Then we headed to Clementine for coffee, and decided to try their Maryland crab soup.  Oh goodness, was it so much yummier than I was thinking it would be.  Next time I am going to have to get my own bowl.

For dinner G went and got some deli chicken, and instead of making sandwiches we plated some of the chicken, each took a hunk of bread, a pile of arugula, some roasted garlic and goat's cheese.  Just kind of assembled as we wished as we went along.  It turned out to be the perfect light meal for us.  

Then we watched Mad Men and the new season of Bones.  Seriously, that man needs to just love that woman, and if you don't know what I'm talking about, go watch Bones.  All the new t.v. is starting up, and I have to say I'm excited to have something to delve into when G's at work (because I watch them online I watch them when it suits me).  Then if it's good, G watches it with me later.  

And this wekeend I picked up the new Dan Brown book, The Lost Symbol.  It has the same main character as Angels and Demons, and The Da Vinci Code.  And the possibility of watching another movie like those with Tom Hanks in it is good enough reason to like the book for me!  However I have been saving it all weekend so I would have something to do while G was at work this week, so I'll let you know what I think tomorrow night.  Yes, I read that fast.  When I say I delve into books I mean it!

And finally I am keeping busy trying to make the perfect moving announcement to send out to friends and family.  After scouring etsy I found an idea I liked where I would have a line drawing of the house as the front of the card with our new address and numbers on the inside.  It's been a while since I've drawn, but I picked up a pad and did a quick sketch that G fell in love with, so now I just need to do a less messy one, scan it into the computer and print onto card stock.  Then I will see if I want to add some color or not.  I will be sure and post a pic of the card on here though once it's finished.  Here's the preliminary.  Forgive the messiness, I did this in about 3 minutes so I could show G my idea.  

Simple but gets the job done.  I'm thinking painting some watercolors on the card stock will make it nicer but keep it as a simple presentation.